When I left Japan, I thought I had finally removed myself from the land of eternal fobbiness. I could not have been more wrong. Who would have thought that Opal Gardens would house some of the fobbiest people that Asia had to offer? And who could have known that my very own roommates would take the cake on uber-fobbiness? Certainly not me.
Fobby Conversation #1:
Grace: Hello [Fobby Asain Roommate #1]. How are you doing?
FAR #1: I'm fine thank you. And you?
Fobby Conversation #2:
FAR #2: What are you doing?
Grace: I am making a sandwich.
FAR #2: I am going to watch you.
Grace: Why on earth would you do that?
FAR #2: I have never seen anyone make a sandwich before. What is that?
Grace: It's hummus.
FAR #2: Is it a sandwich sauce?
Grace: Um, kinda...
FAR #2: What is that?
Grace: Chicken.
FAR #2: So you put chicken and sandwich sauce together?
[It goes on like this for a while. Yes, bread + hummus (or whatever "sandwich sauce" you choose) + cucumbers + chicken slices = my lunch for tomorrow. But you can use WHATEVER floats your boat...]
Fobby Conversation #3:
FAR #2: Are hot dogs made of dogs?
Grace: No, I'm pretty sure that they're not.
Fobby Conversation #4:
[I come into the kitchen with a grocery bag]
FAR #1: Oh, you went shopping! [She is really excited]
Grace: Just some groceries. Nothing special.
FAR #1: We go shopping in my country, too!
Fobby Conversation #5:
FAR #2: You have a runny nose. Are you sick?
Grace: Just a little cold. Nothing serious.
FAR #2: You look tired, too.
Grace: Well, I had to go into lab early today.
FAR #2: And you a pimple on your face. Do you have a lot of stress?
Grace: I think I'll go eat dinner in my room now. Away from you.
[Asian people love to point out obvious physical ailments. I don't know what purpose this is supposed to serve. I'm sure it's not meant to be malicious, but FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. Japanese, Koreans, Chinese, and Taiwanese people all do this. You look exceptionally fat today, you have zits, you look tired/pale, you look like shit... etc etc]
Ah, no matter where I go, a little piece of Asia tags along.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home